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Tuesday, June 18, 2019

Recent News

Trudeau purchases CNRL, restructuring revealed!

CALGARY, Alberta - Breaking news this morning as federal Liberals have announced the purchase of Canadian Natural Resources Limited by the Canadian Federal Government. The...

Technical/Operations

Bitumen Gas found to be Hallucinogenic

VANCOUVER, BC - Researchers at the University of British Columbia Medical School and Chop Shop announced a surprising finding regarding the effects of bitumen...

Hardisty, Alberta welcomes the Western Canadian 2014 Winter Oilympics

HARDISTY, Alberta - The Western Canadian 2014 Winter Oilympics, officially the 1st Winter Oilympics, is a major multi-sport event being held in the bustling metropolis...

Government

Lifestyle

Geology/Geophysics

Geophysicist develops 6th sense for discovering PNG deposits

ESTEVAN, Saskatchewan - Back in the early history of the PNG industry, oil was literally found by stumbling upon seeps of oil that made...

Company cuts core along entire HZ leg of well to confirm in-zone drilling

FORT NELSON, British Columbia - Share price plummeted this week for junior oil and gas operator Short Run Energy, as news of an experimental...

Geologist assaulted for teasing MWD staff

CALGARY, Alberta - A senior wellsite geologist has been hospitalized after a violent incident on a drilling rig in northern Alberta last night. Ricky Rockerson...

NDP to offer Canadian geologists full pension to retire

OTTAWA, Ontario - Early this morning, at a small video press conference with Premier Notley, the federal and Alberta provincial leaders were proposing ideas on...

Crazy Old Fart Reveals Secrets of Seismic Processing

HOUSTON, Texas - Hazy O’Grady, a semi-retired geophysical consultant, claims that he is one of a handful of people who fully understands seismic processing....

Toyota creates Prius Geologist Edition, can’t keep them in stock

TOYOTA CITY, Japan - The Toyota Motor Corporation announced today that it has released a special Prius Geologist Edition to the North American market,...

Long Island Medium star consults for Cheaterson Energy in Texas

DALLAS, Texas - Theresa Caputo, star of TLC's hit reality TV show Long Island Medium, recently signed a 12 month contract with Cheaterson Energy...

Calgary Weather

Calgary
light rain
14.3 ° C
15 °
13.3 °
76 %
4.6kmh
75 %
Tue
17 °
Wed
18 °
Thu
10 °
Fri
13 °
Sat
17 °

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Dear Andy

Dear Andy: I have a crush on a girl from the...

Dear Andy: My name is Jason.  I am an analyst at a PeopleMinus in Calgary. I deal with computers and technology all day, so when...

Environment

Hovercraft skirts road ban, drilling continues

PORTLAND, Oregon - Sneakypete Oil Company of Bellylint, Oregon has been developing a recent oil discovery in northern California but has encountered resistance from...

People's Choice Articles

Scientists invent a process to convert formation water into light oil

CALGARY, Alberta - In a remarkable scientific breakthrough, 2 scientists from the research labs at...

GeoPhone App used to record the seismology of love-making

CALGARY, Alberta - Junior geophysicist and sexual deviant, Dustin "boom boom" Weaver, has remarkably been...

Geologist finds a strong best fit through an amorphous cloud on poro-perm plot

CALGARY, Alberta - There is no question that geology is a subjective science that is...

No pipelines, no trains, just Ass

HARDISTY, Alberta - Pipelines leak.  Got it.  Trains derail.  Got it.  So what is the...

Legendary geologist, Rocky Mindsporge, invents new crayons

CALGARY, Alberta - Superstar geology legend Rocky Mindsporge, renowned for his ability to correlate the...

HR department develops online survey to assess effectiveness of online surveys

CALGARY, Alberta - The Human Resources department of an intermediate oil and gas producer headquartered...

Former oil company executive relegated to greeter

CALGARY, Alberta -The ever growing price differential for bitumen continues to squeeze the netbacks for...

Reservoir engineer creates ‘Neg Pay’ map

HOUSTON, Texas (June 2012) - Johan Fabroni, an enigmatic junior reservoir engineer at Houston-based Drypool...

Aliens vs. Geophysicists – Vibratory Revenge: Movie Review

The Bottom Line This geophyical, sci-fi revenge fantasy thriller fails to deliver on all fronts. Director-Screenwriter Francis Birch Cast Brad...

Anne Hydrite and Ray Tracing – A love story

Anne Hydrite first laid eyes on Ray Tracing at an oil and gas convention in...

Back in the Day

Engineers. Love ’em or hate ’em, you likely gotta deal with...

Engineers. If you live in Calgary, there is a good chance you are an engineer, you are married to an engineer, you work with...

Engineer rearranges contents of dishwasher to optimize dirty dish density

CALGARY, Alberta - After seeing his visiting mother-in-law load the dishwasher following a rather large Sunday afternoon family dinner, Anton McKnight, a Petrophysical Engineer...

Production tech goes for coffee on the way back from going...

CALGARY, Alberta - On his way back from a 45 minute morning coffee run with 3 of his production engineering colleagues at Subterra Resources...

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