LOS ANGELES, California – In a stroke of chemically induced ingenuity, senior geophysicist Smokey Reefer with Oakland-based Vapobong Resources believes he has discovered an oil pool containing hundreds of millions of barrels of oil just beneath Compton, California.
Reports indicate that after a long night of processing and studying the 17 square miles of 3D seismic that Vapobong shot over and around the Los Angeles area, Mr. Reefer hit a mental roadblock as he couldn’t pick his tops nor make heads or tails of the seismic cross sections before him.
Area witnesses stated that they saw a frustrated Mr. Reefer take a smoke break, and after carefully looking at his cigarette, saw him scream to himself, “I need to get down with some sticky icky icky to up my creativity!”
After a short visit from Spidy (an area mobile bootleg pharmacist), Mr. Reefer fired up a massive joint containing some of the best bud that British Columbia has to offer. And after giggling his way back to his office, Smokey grabbed a bag of Doritos, sat in front of his dual monitors, and within 3 minutes of sitting down at his desk, he had discovered the pool.
I noticed when I turned up the frequency to 42.0 HZ, the lines formed a pattern that bears a striking resemblance to Snoop Dogg, the musician, just beneath that anticline. After further investigation and adjustments, I realized that the patterns represent a structural trap that probably contains millions and millions of barrels. I’d better check this out with the team!
The first phase of the drilling in the Broadus field commenced in Q1 2013 with significant success, with wells coming on like gangbusters. The entire team at VapoBong Resources was paid very handsome bonuses, and Smokey, Phillip, and the rest of his crew purchased rather large wheels for their rides.
When asked about an oil pool being discovered under his hometown with a likeness to himself, Calvin Broadus Jr., replied, “Right on, man. You guys are talking about that other kinda oil, ain’t ya? The kind that you put in your car. You had me confused for a minute.”