Operator’s production mysteriously dropped over the holiday season


WEYBURN, Saskatchewan – PetroSchmakken Resources’ stock tumbled in early morning trading today after the intermediate independent but partially crowd sourced oil and gas producer reported lower than expected production in Q4 2013 from its Weyburn area properties. After further investigation, the company learned that a number of its wells were intentionally shut-in, unbeknownst to area operators and production engineers, and for reasons unknown. Area foreman, Ronnie Dorkson, who was as surprised as anybody, was dumbfounded with the findings.

Ronnie Dorkson at work
Ronnie Dorkson at work

You know, I’m not sure what happened here. But one of the reservoir engineers in the head office called me up telling me that there was no production reported in the AeroCat software for our 11-32 well. So I sent one of the operators to out to have a look, and the damn thing was choked all the way off, valves duct taped closed.  What the hell?

According to the company’s press release, it turns out that somewhere between 17 and 20 wells in the area were shut-in without notice or work order, resulting in a 750 bopd drop in production. After confirming with the SEMRWB that the wells were not shut-in by inspectors due to regulatory reasons, the company turned all of the wells back on and brought production back online.

Saskatchewan Energy and Mines Resource & Waterflood Board launched an official investigation into the matter, seeing as criminal charges could possibly be laid in connection with tampering with AER regulated equipment.

Tickleberry, speaks about the incident
Tickleberry, speaks about the incident

Our forensic team found and analyzed the fingerprints and DNA from a number of marijuana roaches found on the scene of 11 of the wells. We punched the DNA into the Saskatchewan CrimiTrack database and it traced back to locally born and raised Mitch Ritchmond. The report generated by the CrimiTrack system shows that Mr. Ritchmond’s employment with PetroSchmakken was terminated just before the Christmas break for reasons PetroSchmakken will not disclose. – Rick Tickleberry, SEMRWB

While finger prints are not damning enough for a conviction in court, local RCMP have questioned Mr. Ritchmond about the incident, and he claims the fingerprints may have been left there when he was jogging past and stopped for a breather.

Ritchmond, Drunk. As usual onlookers told 2P News
Ritchmond, Drunk. As usual onlookers told 2P News

I’m trying to get in better shape for the upcoming apocalypse.  Not the one you see in the movies, but the farm one.  With the wheat and canola.  Anyways, I had nothing to do with those wells.  I may have planned them and drilled them, but I don’t know anything about this recent tampering.  Now if you don’t mind, I have to go for another run. – Ritchmond outside a local Work Ware House.



While Ritchmond is a lead suspect in the case, without direct evidence he did anything wrong it will likely be a case file that goes unsolved in Weyburn, simply added to the pile behind the Tim Hortons.


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