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Bendovus Hires Godzilla to Stomp the Crap out of Rival Companies

CALGARY, Alberta - In a spectacular investigative reporting coup, 2P News has learned that Bendovus Energy of Calgary has struck a deal with the...

Bendovus to Install Jumbotron Next to Headquarters

CALGARY, Alberta - Bendovus Energy announced today that it will be installing a Jumbotron on the side of a building adjacent to its headquarters...

Moosepeace Beer Sponsors Amateur Brewing Contest

CALGARY, Alberta - As a run-up to this year’s Calgary Stampede, Moosepeace Beer of Hudson’s Bay recently sponsored a contest for amateur beer brewers in...

NDP to increase royalties and corporate tax June 1

CALGARY, Alberta - A report released late last night has finally solidified what most intelligent Albertans have long feared.  The Notley NDP will increase oil and...

Moose Turds Identified as New Energy Source; Oil Companies Horrified

CALGARY, Alberta - Research scientists at the University of Calgary announced today that moose droppings in the vicinity of Lake Louise in western Alberta...

Bitumen Gas found to be Hallucinogenic

VANCOUVER, BC - Researchers at the University of British Columbia Medical School and Chop Shop announced a surprising finding regarding the effects of bitumen...

2015 Stampede rumoured to be cancelled

CALGARY, Alberta - In a surprise move this morning, The City of Calgary publicly announced that the Stampede grounds have been purchased by oil...

WWE WrestleMania Event to Feature Energy CEOs

CALGARY, Alberta - World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) spokesman Roland Stownd revealed today that as a special event at the upcoming annual WrestleMania extravaganza at...

43% of Bendovus staff resign after Tuesday’s town hall

CALGARY, Alberta - Bendovus Energy has lost a large percentage of its workforce after a disastrous townhall meeting on Tuesday.  The meeting unveiled a...

Pub lunch costs Bendovus Energy millions

CALGARY, Alberta - Bendovus Energy is feeling the sting of carelessness this week, as a land deal has been approved and paid for without...

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LEAKED VIDEO: Secret Trudeau Water-Box testing

OTTAWA, Ontario -THIS JUST IN! A product-testing video leaked early this morning reveals a federally-funded program to develop a cardboard water box as the...

Pro-oil group confuses leftwing eco-activists at rally with new term ‘anti-anti-pipeline protester supporter’

CALGARY, Alberta – At today’s pro-pipeline rally held at Calgary’s Stampede Park just outside of the Global Petroleum Show, the keynote speaker was easily...

Canada Goosed plans to enter tropical climates in attempt to bolster plunging stock

Luxury parka maker saw its first revenue miss since duping idiots on an IPO back in 2017 Same idiot investors now believe that...

Trudeau purchases CNRL, restructuring revealed!

CALGARY, Alberta - Breaking news this morning as federal Liberals have announced the purchase of Canadian Natural Resources Limited by the Canadian Federal Government. The...

Drinking way, way, way up in Saskatchewan thanks to kids, survey finds

People from SK get drunk more often than anyone else in any of the G20 countries Saskatchewanites do not understand the concept of...