ROSCOE, Texas – Wind turbines. They scatter the rural landscapes from southern Alberta and Saskatchewan all the way down to the south Texas, not to mention the offshore farms in both the Atlantic and the Pacific oceans. Each unit can generate hundreds of megawatts of electricity seemingly for free – powered only by soft gentle breezes and winds that caress the mountain tops.

But what many reneweable energy proponents do not know, is that a recent study conducted by the Organization for Global Weather Patterns (OGWP) concluded that wind farms are disrupting natural wind currents and causing catastrophic weather sequences and climate change across the globe.

According to the study, that was released this morning in the Journal of Renewable Energy, for years wind turbines have caused the prevailing winds on Earth to change significantly. The study cites that the Westerlies have now changed to the Easterlies; the Trade Winds to the I’ll Hang Onto What I got Winds, and these changes are causing an unprecedented number of cylones and hurricanes throughout the Indian Ocean and the Upper-Alantic Ocean region, and also in regions of  Antarctica.

wind
Current wind patterns. Note that the arrows all used to point the other direction.

Speaking from outside of a Jimbo’s Waffles and Pancakes in rural Texas, one of the study’s co-authors, Dr. Franko Zephyr was frantically quoted as saying:

panic
Dr. Zephyr, in a panic

Wind turbine power has gone on for far too long, and our study shows that unless the problem is fixed, aggressive weather patterns are only going to get worse, perhaps to the point that our planet will be inhabitable. Our computer models show that if we convert every wind turbine on the planet into a fan, and flip its propeller over, we can push the air the other way to change the winds to how they once were – a time with more peaceful weather. I realize this will cost a lot of money, and the project will consume more energy than the turbines ever generated, but it MUST BE DONE!

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Two scientists holding part of a large bird that was cut in half by a wind turbine.

The study also cites that roughly 17,000,000 birds are killed every month at the blades of wind turbines on a global scale. In one instance, a report from Tittsville, Saskatchewan described how a mid-sized condor, that was knocked out by a wind turbine,  made its way through the roof of a 4-season sunroom onto an empty serving plate during a large family reunion – much to the family’s surprise.

Opponents to the study claim that the catastrophic and aggressive weather patterns seen in recents years can be attributed to global warming and cyclical climate change, not to wind turbines.

Environmentalist and conservationists believe that Dr. Zephyr’s plans to convert every wind turbine on Earth into a fan is ludicrous, with conservative estimates for such a project costing roughly $497B.  Not to mention the fact there would be a need to build 23 additional coal fired power plants to create the power needed to turn the fans.  The future is uncertain for wind power, and the debate is surely going to get as heated as our atmosphere.

 

3 COMMENTS

  1. In August 2004, the Space Telescope Imaging Spectrograph’s one operational channel failed because of a power supply problem. The observatory’s stabilizing gyroscopes were suffering problems and engineers worried the telescope’s crucial battery packs, operating continuously since launch in 1990, were slowly degrading. No one knew when one might suddenly fail.

    • You had me with “engineers,” but I really don’t know how to respond to your comment. It’s interestingly technical, however, and I like that.

  2. Hey there! I’ve been following your web site for a long time now and finally got the courage to go ahead and give you a shout out from Humble Texas! Just wanted to say keep up the great job!

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