Calgary-startup has solution to the abandoned wells problem; Alberta’s oil and gas regulator is...
In Alberta, there are roughly 237,000 drilled wells that need to be abandoned and their leases remediated and reclaimed. About 80,000 of these wells are currently non-producing (referred to as inactive wells), while another...
Alberta-developed CCR technology to avert planet earth’s next glaciation event
EDMONTON, Alberta - Roughly 700 million years ago, before multicellular animals emerged or plants made their way to land, Earth was plunged into an ice age that lasted for 57 million years. Now, a...
City of Calgary to implement insane economic recovery plan initiatives, says leaked memo
CALGARY, Alberta – A leaked memo from Calgary's city hall revealed a shocking economic plan early this morning that is leaving people bewildered. According to a source that asked 2P News to remain anonymous,...
Secret oil and gas well causes disaster
EDMONTON, ALBERTA – In a storage yard south of Edmonton, Alberta a disaster unfolded over the May long weekend. It started with a prank, became a project, and ended in a serious mess.
According to...
The profession that is most important to the success of the Oil and Gas industry across western Canada is:
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NHL inks puck deal with oil and gas service company for...
TORONTO, The Centre of the Universe -Â According to the Disassociated Press, the National Hockey League has just signed a deal with Red Deer-based...
MILF Capital to acquire cash-strapped Cougar Valley Resources in all cash...
Transaction grows MILFs presence in the hot, yet dated, Brazzers unconventional play
MILF plans to continue strategy of resurrecting old dry holes and...
How a public car insurance lawsuit by a Regina geologist is...
SASKATOON, Saskatchewan -Â A Regina-based petroleum geologist has filed a lawsuit against Saskatchewan Government Insurance (SGI), citing an insurance claim to which they deemed no-fault....
peopleMINUS minusing people strikes a Chord with Calgary staff
CALGARY, Alberta - peopleMINUS Corporation says that being acquired by Houston-based Chordy Energy is responsible for the decision to close its longstanding office in...
Top Ten changes Naheed Nenshi promises to make if elected leader...
EDMONTON, Alberta - By now we all know that former Calgary mayor, Naheed Nenshi, is vying for the top spot in the Alberta New...
Montreal eco-startup to build first-of-its-kind 175MW wind farm just outside of...
RED DEER, Alberta - Montreal eco-tech startup, Tabarnak Putain Calice Energy (TPCE) has announced today the start of construction of Connard Merde, a wind...
Kenney: “The UCP will get you between Calgary and Edmonton in...
EDMONTON, Alberta - After a memorandum of understanding (MOU) with Toronto-based TransPod Inc. for a multi-billion dollar hyperloop transportation project fell through last week,...
Dear Andy – I Need Moose Hunting Advice
Dear Andy,
I’ve been invited to go on a moose hunting expedition up to Yukon Territory this winter and I have no idea what will...
Calgary-based geologist patents GeoThermals™
CALGARY, Alberta - Kristoph Iverson, graduated in 2001 with a geology degree, got a job at Encana, as most of his class did. Eventually...
5 Things everyone should know about geologists (Part II)
<This article was originally published sometime in 2014, but after making some changes to it (based on feedback from some angry readers), it is...
Geology-inspired Phi-K Doughnuts coming to downtown Calgary this spring
CALGARY, Alberta - Calgary is the hotbed for doughnut shops ranging from the basics at Tim Hortons all the way up to the 2nd-tier...
Yellowstone Supervolcano Erupts; Mankind Doomed
The supervolcano in Yellowstone National Park in Wyoming that had been dormant for 640,000 years erupted yesterday, spewing hundreds of millions of tons of...
Geophrenologist Claims Ability to Locate Oil and Gas
LOONEYTUNE, California - The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines phrenology as the study of the conformation of the skull based on the belief that it is...
New-age energy startup struggles with well identity
The Disassociated Press | 3 minute read
CALGARY, Alberta - A Nelson, BC oil and gas exploration company that drilled its first 5-well pad 3...
Crazy Old Fart Reveals Secrets of Seismic Processing
HOUSTON, Texas - Hazy O’Grady, a semi-retired geophysical consultant, claims that he is one of a handful of people who fully understands seismic processing....
Casket Wars Canada reality TV show sweeping the nation
CALGARY, Alberta - From the network that brought you Storage Wars and 27 & Counting, B&E's brand new reality TV show, Casket Wars Canada,...
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2P News Staff
Most Commented
Houston area man drills well in backyard, charges laid
HOUSTON, Texas - A Sugar Land, TX man and his neighbour are in police custody after the duo drilled an unauthorized gas well in the backyard of one of the men in search of...
Geologist assaulted for teasing MWD staff
CALGARY, Alberta - A senior wellsite geologist has been hospitalized after a violent incident on a drilling rig in northern Alberta last night.
Ricky Rockerson was violently beaten to within an inch of his life...
Legendary geologist, Rocky Mindsporge, invents new crayons
CALGARY, Alberta - Superstar geology legend Rocky Mindsporge, renowned for his ability to correlate the patterns required in CandyCrush and Tetris to oil and gas plays, has designed a new set of specialty geology crayons...
Crustal drilling project results in Volcano near Didsbury
RED DEER, Alberta - Central Alberta was thrust into chaos this morning when a deep test well may have instigated the first active volcano in Alberta's history. Â Deep Thrust Energy, a conglomerate of consolidated...
Dear Andy: My wife left me, I’m lonely, and looking for...
Dear Andy,
The old lady kicked me out of the house a couple of months ago and I’m feeling a bit tense, if you know...
Anti-fracking protesters charged in New Brunswick
LAKETON, New Brunswick - Fredericton RCMP reported earlier today that 2 people were rushed to area hospitals with serious injuries and 37 more sustained...
People's Choice Articles
Scientists invent a process to convert formation water into light oil
CALGARY, Alberta - In a remarkable scientific breakthrough, 2 scientists from the research labs at...
GeoPhone App used to record the seismology of love-making
CALGARY, Alberta - Junior geophysicist and sexual deviant, Dustin "boom boom" Weaver, has remarkably been...
Geologist finds a strong best fit through an amorphous cloud on poro-perm plot
CALGARY, Alberta - There is no question that geology is a subjective science that is...
No pipelines, no trains, just Ass
HARDISTY, Alberta - Pipelines leak. Got it. Trains derail. Got it. So what is the...
Legendary geologist, Rocky Mindsporge, invents new crayons
CALGARY, Alberta - Superstar geology legend Rocky Mindsporge, renowned for his ability to correlate the...
HR department develops online survey to assess effectiveness of online surveys
CALGARY, Alberta - The Human Resources department of an intermediate oil and gas producer headquartered...
Former oil company executive relegated to greeter
CALGARY, Alberta -The ever growing price differential for bitumen continues to squeeze the netbacks for...
Reservoir engineer creates ‘Neg Pay’ map
HOUSTON, Texas (June 2012) - Johan Fabroni, an enigmatic junior reservoir engineer at Houston-based Drypool...
Aliens vs. Geophysicists – Vibratory Revenge: Movie Review
The Bottom Line
This geophyical, sci-fi revenge fantasy thriller fails to deliver on all fronts.
Director-Screenwriter
Francis Birch
Cast
Brad...
Anne Hydrite and Ray Tracing – A love story
Anne Hydrite first laid eyes on Ray Tracing at an oil and gas convention in...
Back in the Day
Engineers. Love ’em or hate ’em, you likely gotta deal with...
Engineers. If you live in Calgary, there is a good chance you are an engineer, you are married to an engineer, you work with...
Engineer rearranges contents of dishwasher to optimize dirty dish density
CALGARY, Alberta - After seeing his visiting mother-in-law load the dishwasher following a rather large Sunday afternoon family dinner, Anton McKnight, a Petrophysical Engineer...
Production tech goes for coffee on the way back from going...
CALGARY, Alberta - On his way back from a 45 minute morning coffee run with 3 of his production engineering colleagues at Subterra Resources...
