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Bazooka Rockets Dig Quick, Cheap Oil Wells
FT. MCMURRAY, Alberta – The newly incorporated Rocket Pulverized Ground (RPG) Company announced plans to offer a cheap, efficient method of drilling shallow oil...
Technical/Operations
New Spaceplane Service From Calgary to Edmonton Announced
EDMONTON, Alberta - Bolide Airlines announced today at a press conference that it is placing in service a passenger version of the Boing X-37B unmanned...
Sir William’s History Corner: Obsolete Oil Patch Phrases
BREA, California – In this installment of History Corner we turn our attention to a few phrases or sayings that were once in common...
Geology/Geophysics
Problem geologists need help: WOOPS
EDMONTON, Alberta - In response to the sorry state of affairs in the profession of petroleum geology, the World Organization of Petroleum Societies (WOOPS)...
GeoPhone App used to record the seismology of love-making
CALGARY, Alberta - Junior geophysicist and sexual deviant, Dustin "boom boom" Weaver, has remarkably been able to find rather strong correlations between various sexual...
Scientists mathematically prove that geologists are absolute idiots
GENEVA, Switzerland - Scientists at the Fribourg University of Cardinal Knowledge have just proven that geologists (and all other geo"scientists") are complete idiots. This...
Geologist-in-Training launches wrongful dismissal suit
CALGARY, Alberta - Zeerana Astransy graduated with honors from the University of Alberta in 2012, and quickly made a move to a development role...
NDP to offer Canadian geologists full pension to retire
OTTAWA, Ontario - Early this morning, at a small video press conference with Premier Notley, the federal and Alberta provincial leaders were proposing ideas on...
Geology-inspired Phi-K Doughnuts coming to downtown Calgary this spring
CALGARY, Alberta - Calgary is the hotbed for doughnut shops ranging from the basics at Tim Hortons all the way up to the 2nd-tier...
Geologists form independent professional association
CALGARY, Alberta - A group of 13 geologists in Alberta's largest city have made a stand against the ranks of TCEGWC (or The Collective...
Unemployed Petroleum Professionals Technical Conference coming to Calgary this summer!
CALGARY, Alberta - The Canadian Society of Unemployed Petroleum Professionals (CSUPP) is hosting its inaugural Technical Conference & Exhibition this summer. The society, whose...
420 MMbbl oil pool discovered in Compton, CA
LOS ANGELES, California - In a stroke of chemically induced ingenuity, senior geophysicist Smokey Reefer with Oakland-based Vapobong Resources believes he has discovered an...
Geophysicist develops 6th sense for discovering PNG deposits
ESTEVAN, Saskatchewan - Back in the early history of the PNG industry, oil was literally found by stumbling upon seeps of oil that made...
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2P News Staff
Most Commented
Dear Andy
Dear Andy: How should I propose to my girlfriend?
Dear Andy:
My name is Peter and I am a geoscientist. I have spent have the last year of my life with a girl who I...
Environment
PETA calls to put an end to all LNG development
KITIMAT, British Columbia - PETA is very busy yet again, but instead of lobbying to create a roadside memorial for a number or chickens who tragically lost their...
People's Choice Articles
Scientists invent a process to convert formation water into light oil
CALGARY, Alberta - In a remarkable scientific breakthrough, 2 scientists from the research labs at...
GeoPhone App used to record the seismology of love-making
CALGARY, Alberta - Junior geophysicist and sexual deviant, Dustin "boom boom" Weaver, has remarkably been...
Geologist finds a strong best fit through an amorphous cloud on poro-perm plot
CALGARY, Alberta - There is no question that geology is a subjective science that is...
No pipelines, no trains, just Ass
HARDISTY, Alberta - Pipelines leak. Got it. Trains derail. Got it. So what is the...
Legendary geologist, Rocky Mindsporge, invents new crayons
CALGARY, Alberta - Superstar geology legend Rocky Mindsporge, renowned for his ability to correlate the...
HR department develops online survey to assess effectiveness of online surveys
CALGARY, Alberta - The Human Resources department of an intermediate oil and gas producer headquartered...
Former oil company executive relegated to greeter
CALGARY, Alberta -The ever growing price differential for bitumen continues to squeeze the netbacks for...
Reservoir engineer creates ‘Neg Pay’ map
HOUSTON, Texas (June 2012) - Johan Fabroni, an enigmatic junior reservoir engineer at Houston-based Drypool...
Aliens vs. Geophysicists – Vibratory Revenge: Movie Review
The Bottom Line
This geophyical, sci-fi revenge fantasy thriller fails to deliver on all fronts.
Director-Screenwriter
Francis Birch
Cast
Brad...
Anne Hydrite and Ray Tracing – A love story
Anne Hydrite first laid eyes on Ray Tracing at an oil and gas convention in...
Back in the Day
Engineers. Love ’em or hate ’em, you likely gotta deal with...
Engineers. If you live in Calgary, there is a good chance you are an engineer, you are married to an engineer, you work with...
Engineer rearranges contents of dishwasher to optimize dirty dish density
CALGARY, Alberta - After seeing his visiting mother-in-law load the dishwasher following a rather large Sunday afternoon family dinner, Anton McKnight, a Petrophysical Engineer...
Production tech goes for coffee on the way back from going...
CALGARY, Alberta - On his way back from a 45 minute morning coffee run with 3 of his production engineering colleagues at Subterra Resources...
