Prime Minister Harper just before leaving on trade mission to Peru and Columbia Tuesday morning. The security guard to the left reported that Harper whispered under his breath, “I’m leaving the country for a while, I hope the heat is down when I return. Suckers.”

OTTAWA, Ontario – In a shocking development in the Federal Senate Scandal with far reaching incriminatory accusations, the associated press has secured electronic documents that show Prime Minister Harper was the mastermind behind a tangled web of communications that lead to him approving the $90,000 payout from his former Chief of Staff, Mr. Wright, to Senator Duffy.

Actual photograph of Nigel Wright writing the $90,000 cheque to Senator Duffy.

These monies where then electronically wired to alleged drug dealers who were paid to fabricate a grainy video showing Mayor Ford smoking crack. All of this in an attempt to tarnish the top Toronto city official’s squeaky clean reputation once the Prime Minister’s Office learned of Mayor Ford’s secret plan to run  for the top position of the Federal Conservative party.
Mayor Rob Ford whispering something in the ear of his brother, Councillor Doug Ford. A Whisper2000 device was used to intercept the message which reads, “Hey Dougie, man, can you talk to Spidey about getting me some ice and some green?”

Harper feared that the would-be Prime Minister Ford, who is from central Canada, would over-tax oilsands development (to bring money to Ontario) to the point that a number of major oilsands players would become bankrupt, including 2 unnamed companies in which Prime Minister Harper owns an undisclosed number of (significant) shares.

Sources close to Harper also indicated that he purchased the shares through the 1990s with money personally lent to him from then National Assembly of Quebec member Thomas Mulclair, who borrowed the money from his now ex-wife Christy Clark. In a shocking twist in this story, Christy Clark’s step-sister, the openly gay Ontario Premier Kathleen Wynne, who was then heterosexual (and dating an underaged Justin Trudeau), wrote a cheque to Christy Clark, who then handed it to Thomas Mulclair in a bitter divorce settlement, who in-turn wired it to Harper. Harper then then bought the shares in the unnamed companies. And although there is absolutely no proof of any connection to former Prime Minister Paul Martin and the Sponsorgate scandal of the late 90s, the editor has always wanted to just mention that scandal.

The image below shows the organizational hierarchy for the SpendingGate scandal centered around Stephen “Shark Eyes” harper.

This chart depicts the flow of money through this SpendingGate scandal.

Chief Ottawa political correspondent with OTV news had the following to say,

Bruce McJagginson

“As you can see from the flowchart, this is a serious web of money transfers, marriages, divorces, distant family connections, sexual orientation, and business investments that has lead back to Prime Minister Harper.

To think that he was behind the idea of fabricating a video of Mayor Ford smoking crack just to protect his significant investments in a couple of very large oilsands players is unfathomable. Harper and everybody involved in this scandal will have some difficult questions to answer in the coming weeks and months.” – Bruce McJagginson, with OTV

Repeated attempts to contact any of those involved in this SpendingGate have been rejected by the PMO. 2P News will keep you up to date with the latest developments in this scandal.


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  2. Why thank you, oragasmos intensos. Wait. What’s up with your name? I don’t speak Spanish, but I think I know what’s going on there.

  3. ….and just then, a trucking service provider reaches the factory, and out come 21 clowns yelling “TTEEEAAAI!!!!”

    hahahaha…now thats a good joke!

  4. This is a bullshit story full of untruths. Christy Clark was never married to Thomas Mulcair and Katherine Wynn is not her half sister. And everything written about Harper is fabricated. Whoever wrote this isn’t a journalist. They should write for one of those shithouse rags

    • Whoa, whoa, whoa… pump your brakes Fran. I wrote this piece back in 2013 and how dare you say that I’m not a journalist?!??


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