CALGARY, Alberta – In a surprise move this morning, The City of Calgary publicly announced that the Stampede grounds have been purchased by oil and gas giant Bendovus Energy. The sale is taking place while the city is facing financial stress due to plummeting oil prices. While fiscally beneficial for the City, analysts have no idea what sparked the sale or it’s final approval from the city.
We have brokered the deal to include all amenities, parking, and accesses to the grounds. Bendovus will be the full owner of the property and access for events or public use will need to be determined by lease agreements negotiated with the company’s land department. So don’t expect speedy agreements. We have a verbal agreement to consider allowing the Stampede back onto the grounds in the future, but there will be many considerations and conditions in place. We may find it easier to hold the Calgary Stampede in Carstairs or Langdon, of course we could change the name accordingly. – John Faastfuq, City of Calgary Property Division.
The sale of the property will be finalized by January 15th, 2015, with the actual hand over of the property and its facilities later in the first quarter. While speculation on the intended use of the grounds runs rampant, most agree it is merely an investment for Bendovus, and there is nothing sinister behind the deal.
Other groups such as Bend-Over Bendovus, and Down with Deng! are claiming the company will use the grounds for testing and experimentation. Much like its underground labs below the Bow Building’s parkades.
They don’t care about Stampede or a damn rodeo! They want to use the building for oil and gas experiments and frac testing. All that water just flowing by the grounds, tracks for rig move speed testing, not to mention the sheer open space they will have to run pipeline experiments and failure tests. We also heard they got the mineral rights! So are they going to drill there and test fracking too?! Gerry Fungshway, Calgary Citizens Advocate Group of Sunnyside
While the deal has not be signed and finalized, it is all but approved according to Bendovus insiders. When asked for a comment outside his favourite lunch location, CEO Deng Dongbin commented:
We need this to improve and expand our abilities as a five star company and PNG operator. We have the largest tower in Calgary, yes. But we need the largest inner city field as well to house our mainframes and spare furniture. In the future we may also require our own airport and medical facilites, but that remains to be seen. I did make a run at the Alberta Children’s Hospital last year to no avail. Perhaps we will make another offer in 2016.
This can’t happen! I make the most money from drunken oil people during Stampede.