Mr. Francis X. Ploiter
Mr. Francis X. Ploiter

NEW YORK CITY, New York – Marvel™ Entertainment, LLC announced that its comic book subsidiary, Marvel™ Worldwide, Inc. has purchased the rights to the character “OilMan” created by petroleum industry veterans Kelly Bushing and Dick Hertz. OilMan appeared as a daily comic strip in the Ft. McMurray Herald-Bloviator.  Francis X. Ploiter, Director of Marketing for Marvel™, said, “This character will be a marvelous addition to the Marvel™ universe. Marvelous, simply marvelous.”

Once he was done irritating everyone with his repetitiveness, Mr. Ploiter gave a presentation about OilMan.

“We’re doing the ol’ switcheroo.  He is the first villain to be a title character in the Marvel™ Universe. To be sure, we will be targeting a niche market of people who either loathe or love the oil and gas industry, but our market research indicates the title will be profitable. Scripting, drawing and inking will be assigned to Marvel™ artists who have nothing better to do or just got out of prison and need to polish up their skills.”

OilMan
OilMan

He continued his discourse by outlining the background of the OilMan character. “Stanley R. Mehoff was an obnoxious landman for an oil and gas company in Bakersfield, California. He was so annoying his colleagues nicknamed him ‘Jerk’ Mehoff. Jerk was sent to a drilling location in South Texas to confirm the legality of the lease. He enraged the tool pusher so much that he got tossed into the mud pit and was left to drown. The pit was full of oily drilling mud and a large amount of NORM (naturally occurring radioactive material). After several days, he managed to crawl his way out of the pit, finding that the radiation had mutated him into OilMan! He now oozes oil from every pore of his body 24 hours a day, leaving a trail like the slime of a snail. Vowing revenge, he sets about wreaking environmental havoc throughout the continent, trying to make sure oil companies are blamed. However, his evil machinations are usually thwarted by his arch-nemesis, EnviroMan and his sidekick NimbyBoy.”

Mr. Ploiter was asked about the unusual switch of villain and hero as the title character. “It’s simply a device to draw attention to a new series. Hopefully it will upset the environmentalists and we’ll get even more publicity. If it doesn’t work out, we’ll make EnviroMan the headliner.” He added that a movie adaptation is not likely unless a wider audience develops.

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