NDP finally concedes and agrees to reduce minimum wage by -$2.50 by 2019

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EDMONTON, Alberta – With mounting pressure from the public and the official opposition,  Alberta’s NDP government has finally decided to claw back its controversial minimum wage hikes by reducing it by -$1.25 by 2019, and if reelected, by an additional -$1.75 in 2020, -$2.00 in 2021, and -$2.75 in 2022.

At a press conference held at Rico’s BBQ Shack in Sherwood Park, finance minister Joe Ceci addressed a crowd of small business owners.

Joe Ceci, Alberta’s Finance Minister

“You have spoken and we have listened. The minimum wage hikes that we  rolled out are hurting small businesses right in the pocket book. Well, with our new plan, we are going to decrease minimum wage over 4 years starting in 2019 by a total of $7.75 per hour. That ought to be music to your ears.” – Joe Ceci, Finance Minister

Opposition critics are quick to see past these rate reductions, claiming that they are simply typical rhetoric employed by the NDP in an early attempt to woo back voters for the 2019 provincial election.

Jason Kenny, leader of the United Conservative Party, had the following to say, “They must think Albertans are stupid. “We are wise to the NDP’s minimum wage reduction plan, but we just need to figure out their ulterior motive. That Skelator-lookin’ Rachel Notley is a shady one, and we know she and her puppet minions are up to something.”

Bruce Luvmekrayons, a geologist with Calgary-based EnKarma Corporation, loves the idea of the minimum wage claw backs, and stated that he’s planning to make a similar request to his supervisor at work.

Bruce Luvmekrayons with EnKarma Corp

“I know things are still very rough in the gas patch, operators are still doing everything they can to save every penny and reduce costs as much as possible. So I’m thinking about helping out  by demanding that I receive a -15% pay cut effective immediately. In fact, they can cut it by up to -30 per cent if they dare; its okay, I’ll still be able to scrape by.”

Toronto-based accounting giant KPEEMGY claims that the NDP’s minimum wage math does not check out and they continue to investigate to figure out why.

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