CALGARY, AB — Proving once again that the oilpatch remains the beating heart of questionable innovation, two Calgary engineers have quit their corporate jobs to launch Frack n' Snack Engineering Solutions™, the city’s first mobile oil & gas consulting company operated entirely out of a repurposed 1998 GMC food truck that promises "fast, fresh, on-the-go technical expertise, while you wait." The founders, Cindy “Sidetrack” McKinnon, a drilling & completions engineer, and Felipe “P10” Morales, a reservoir engineer, say they’re “disrupting...

By Cynthia Redbush | 2P News – Education, Petroleum, and Paper Cuts Division EDMONTON, AB - Following their government-forced return to classrooms, Alberta teachers are adapting to new realities with an unprecedented plan: enlisting unemployed engineers and geologists from the oil patch to “help manage educational turbulence” in the classroom. 2P News’ senior education correspondent Cynthia Redbush sat down with ATA President Jayson Billing, who explained the union’s strategy while nervously constructing a stress pyramid out of chalk, coffee stir sticks, and...

EDMONTON, Alberta - As contract talks between the Alberta Teachers’ Association and the province hit the “we’ll-legislate-you-back” stage of negotiations, educators across the province are already preparing their battle plans. If Premier Danielle Smith's provincial government forces them back into classrooms, teachers say they’ll comply, but only in the most educationally passive-aggressive ways possible. Here are the Top Ten Things Alberta Teachers Plan to Do Once They’re Legislated Back to Work. 10. The Return of the TV/VCR Cart You thought they were gone....

GENEVA, Switzerland - In a groundbreaking study published this week in the Journal of Computational Nonsense, researchers at the Federal University of Klingnau's department of Spreadsheet Physics have finally uncovered the reason why anything copied into Microsoft Excel’s clipboard vanishes after precisely 4.20 picoseconds. According to lead scientist Dr. Kat Schrod, “The clipboard doesn’t actually delete your data — it merely ceases to exist within our observable universe. At that timescale, Excel transitions into a quantum mechanical superposition of ‘copied’...

HOUSTON, Texas - A Sugar Land, TX man and his neighbour are in police custody after the duo drilled an unauthorized gas well in the backyard of one of...

CALGARY, Alberta - A senior wellsite geologist has been hospitalized after a violent incident on a drilling rig in northern Alberta last night. Ricky Rockerson was violently beaten to within...

CALGARY, Alberta - Superstar geology legend Rocky Mindsporge, renowned for his ability to correlate the patterns required in CandyCrush and Tetris to oil and gas plays, has designed a new...

RED DEER, Alberta - Central Alberta was thrust into chaos this morning when a deep test well may have instigated the first active volcano in Alberta's history.  Deep Thrust...